Thursday, February 3, 2011

No babies this time...

I've been putting off writing this because I don't like to dwell on the negative, but we received results from the first and second beta and they both gave results of 2...so, we are waiting to hear from the docs about what our next step should be. I feel like an infant in this process; it's all totally new to me since I never tried to conceive after the birth of my son 30 years ago.
Although I researched the clinics offering Surrogacy, I didn't research the whole IVF process, so I am just getting to that now. Alcy didn't actually know that Surrogacy existed, as it doesn't in Cuba, so he is just learning about all this from me and going along with everything.

We didn't know there were things he could do to increase his chances and things he shouldn't do...he was in the hot tub ( with a few drinks of Havana Club rum ) the weekend before we left for Mumbai. We were told, however, that there was no problem with his sperm, but we (he) would have been more careful had we been aware.

Now, that doesn't explain the low egg count which I have been completely mystified by, but maintaining the positive stance that it only takes one good egg to have a baby.  We had extremely poor results and though I didn't really question them while in the 2ww, I can't help but question them now. According to the research I've done, the average number of eggs released after stimulation is between 12 and 15/20, but it's possible to only have five or to have as many as 35. The two eggs we used, created perfect embryo's and even with assisted hatching they failed to implant, so was the issue with implanting ( the SM's womb )?..or is it just that even perfect-looking embryo's can have defects and it's natures way...

Okay, that was my vent. Must stay positive for the next attempt! We have 3 frozen embryo's, fortunately, so we have another chance, but that's it; we don't have any more. We sort of factored in having three attempts with the same Surrogate, but will have just two. We haven't heard back from the Docs about when we can try again and the time difference and inability to communicate freely is prohibitive and frustrating.

I have too much time on my hands since we've had snow for the last two days - we got one storm that came up from Texas and another system that came from Ontario, making our road impassable except with a truck, studded tires and extreme caution and I'm a wimp when it comes to driving in bad weather. Must at least go help Alcy shovel...

4 comments:

  1. Wish there was a simple answer. I asked all the same questions with each negative. I still fully believe its just luck of the draw. Not what you want to hear I am sure.

    Just know you are not alone and it gets a little bit easier with each passing day.

    big hugs my friend.

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  2. Sorry to hear this. We had 4 negatives before we changed things up to finally get a positive. Its not an easy go, but know you are not alone.

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  3. Hi, I just found your blog. I am sorry about your negative, it does only take one, and hopefully your FET will be positive.

    I found this the other day - it's about embryology and the stages of embryo development - I thought it might interest you.

    Meg

    http://www.embryology.ch/anglais/iperiodembry/carnegie02.html

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  4. Thanks everyone for your messages and thanks for the link Meg. We are okay, but the time waiting to do the next transfer is long, made worse by a long cold winter. Can't wait to hear some good news next month! It is one month exactly since the last transfer.

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